You know what scares me? Life scares me.
I’m sure I’m not alone in this, though. I’m scared about finding a job after I graduate. I’m not conceited or stupid, I know there are a lot of people out there and in this area that are much better writers than I am. So what do I do if I can’t find a job in my major? I suppose I’ll just go for any job that I can find, then. Even though I’m worried about finding a job in my major (especially in this economy) I know that if I just keep on trying, I will find one sooner or later. There have been so many known writers in the past that were denied multiple times and never gave up.
Life also scares me in the way that I’m sure is common to others as well. I just started dating this guy, Dave. I never thought I would fall for someone so fast, and yet it happened. We’ve been dating for over a month now and he’s already asked me to move with him after I graduate. This is a scary thought because living in the little town of East Greenville with my parents and brother is all I’ve known. Although, the thought of moving away with Dave was somewhat comforting because that’s how comfortable I feel around him already. He recently found out that there are job openings in his town and in his major, though. This is a serious relief because it means I don’t have to move.
Life scares me, but that’s okay.
I’ve come to the realization that everyone has those fears, and everyone goes through the same thought process. After going through the thought process, there are two kinds of people. There are the ones that stay scared and continue going on their merry little way. And then there’s the kind that decide to branch off and broaden their horizons, step out of their comfort zone, and grow as a person. Some of the ones that stay scared most likely stay in their same hometown with the same people they’ve known their whole lives. The ones that grow are the people that move and discover new things, see new places, and meet new people.
Is it possible to find a balance?
My family is a huge part of my life, and they know that. For the past few years I’ve imagined my whole family still living close and getting together every weekend. My parents and brother and I have joked around for years about all living on a commune with our spouses and kids as one big happy family. For the longest time I thought that there was actually a good chance of that happening. Dave doesn’t necessarily have a problem with that because he loves my family. But why did the sound of moving if one of us found a job opportunity out-of-state sound so appealing? The more I thought about it, the more comfortable with the idea I got. Now that I know that there are job opportunities around us in his major (Environmental planning) I immediately felt relief… but then felt disappointment.
I guess I’ll just live life as it comes.
There’s no point to living in fear.
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